false hope.

no car tomorrow. have to wait until monday. sucks. i'm pretty upset....
i'm going to try to relax and read now. our apartment is like a sauna because we don't have air conditioning. no one really does here. it's wierd to me. it gets to be in the 90's. not fun.
i'm starting another Jodi Picoult book. i was listening to The Tenth Circle before the car situation happened and now don't have that so i just finished the book. loved it. i'm going to read Mercy now. maybe that's what i'll do this weekend. we could take the bus to greenlake together. we were hoping to go to see a movie this weekend. looks like that's not happening.
this would be the best time for us to just all of a sudden win like $500.00 and be able to go away for the weekend. we need it. we're both so frustrated, upset and stressed out. it's not good for us to be this way together. okay, i'm really going to go and read now. i miss dancing so much. that used to be my outlet...now that i don't have that, i'm not good at dealing with stress...at all. reading helps though, its another world and then i dont' have to think about mine.

we're on our way...

The end of our rocky week is coming to a close. We will again have a car tomorrow and will not have to worry about getting rides or taking the bus. We have learned so much and in a way, I'm glad that something like this happened. Not glad for the trouble it caused, but for what it has taught us. We not only learned how to deal with a terrible situation, but found out that together, we can get things done and will be alright in the long run. It will be great to have the car and to direct our focus back to getting out of debt and paying for and planning our wedding.
I've learned that I can be 2,000 miles away from my family and can still get through a crisis on my own. Well, with the help of Matt. We're a team and always will be.
Matt has a lead for a new job through Microsoft and I am really hoping that this goes somewhere. If it does, not only will our financial situation be looking up, but Matt's chin will go up as well.
My dad is on the road to getting a new job and after his interview today, that he said went so well, he is thinking that this job will be his. This is the best news that we've heard in a while. Even with all that is going on with our car...well, Matt's car technically. I'm praying for both of them that this all goes well for them.
So with only three credit cards, medical debt, and a college semester left to pay off...along with the car, our apartment and our wedding...I'd say we are on our way again to getting out of this hole we've dug ourselves into. When we get married, I want all of our debt to be gone and for us to have some money saved. (That's what I'd like to happen ideally...realistically, just to be out of debt would be great)

We are definitely on our way...

he's sleeping. i'm writing.

It is 2:30 in the morning and I have just finished reading, "The Time Traveler's Wife." I couldn't put the book down! I love books that are that way. The book was slow to start and then the more and more I read, the more and more I wanted to read. I'm always a sucker for a love story.

As I was reading and even now, Matt is laying next to me sound asleep. All I can think about while he is here next to me right now is that I want to be with him for all of the time that I have here. I don't want to miss a second with him. While I was reading and he was curled up next to me I couldn't help but to stop reading and just hold him. I know he didn't know I was doing it, but the story is all about "waiting" and I just felt so happy to know that I didn't have to wait anymore to find him...he's right here with me. I am the luckiest girl in the world to have Matt. He loves me more than I ever could have imagined I would ever be loved. Tonight we were sitting on the couch; just talking and thinking about everything that is going on right now and he said to me, "You're my number 1, you will always be my number 1 and you will always come first." I don't think he expected me to from him saying that because he looks at it as a given, but it made me cry. Just to know and feel that he loves me more than anything in the whole world and to know that and believe him when he tells me things like that...it's amazing. The best feeling I've ever known.
I hope that we always have this feeling. I hope that there will be nights when we're in our 30's or 50's and our 90's where I lay next to him at night and know that I am the luckiest girl in the world to have him. Nights where I can't help watching him when he sleeps or to just hold him so tight and make sure he feels as much love from me as I feel from him. I can't even get it out in words how much I love Matt. Every single day I love him more. I have heard people say that before, but never knew it was really possible. I wonder how much I'll love him when we're 43. It will be an absolute crazy amount! ...I am crazy about him...(even when he's driving me crazy)...that's a good sign.

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.

We are in such a tough spot right now. No car and neither of us work where we live. I have learned how to take the city bus. I'm not a fan, at all. I work from 8-5 in Seattle and if I want to get there by 8:00, I have to leave by 6:00am. I got a ride from Matt's dad yesterday so I didn't have to leave until 6:30...got to work at 7:30, and my nanny mom had me start working early. So I worked for 9.5 hours yesterday. Then it took me 2 hours and 20 minutes to get home from work...I missed my first bus and then had to find a whole new route and walk a mile to get to a new stop. It was a long day...and it was just the first of many more to come. Well, hopefully not too many, but I know that for sure I'll have to do this next week. Next week is an easy work week, so that stress will be gone and that's a blessing for timing. I usually nanny for 4 children. Monday I'll only have 3 kids...Tuesday I'm off...Wednesday just 3 kids...Thursday 1 kid and Friday 1 kid for a half day and then I have to spend the other half of the day organizing the play room and cleaning. That won't be so bad. Hopefully by then, we'll have the car back.

I'm going dress shopping with my soon-to-be sister-in-law today! I'm going to ask her to be my bridesmaid and then we're going to the dress shop. It will be a lot of fun : ). I am so relieved that we have a wedding date and that from tomorrow, it is just 11 months until we're married! I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with Matt. We have been through so much together and we're so in love...he's amazing. Now that we have our location, we just have to work through all the details. I love wedding planning!

it's a date.

June 19, 2010.

Our wedding date.
The planner at Chula Vista Resort gave us some amazing news today.

We thought that we were going to have to pay a $1,000 deposit on our reception location before we would be able to officially book our date. My grandma's boyfriend works at the resort and spoke with the planner. It has now been worked out that we HAVE the date and will worry about the money later! This is the date we really wanted and to actually know the date we will be married, the day that will forever be our anniversary, is the most amazing feeling. And now, the countdown officially begins...we couldn't be happier about this!

Epiphany

I can't sleep right now and have realized that I really want my bridesmaids dresses to be a deep yellow. Not a lemon yellow. But not ugly mustard yellow. Just a nice mustard yellow, bright but deep. I love it for summer. And I am considering letting my bridesmaids all choose different dresses but just having the same color. This could change, most likely will. But for right now at 1:30 in the morning 11 months before our wedding...my bridesmaid dresses are going to be yellow. I am very excited about this.

Details in the Fabric

Planning, planning and more planning. I've been in touch with our planner at Chula Vista Resort. We told her that we wanted a summer date because we will have guests coming that have never been to Wisconsin Dells. Matt and I know that the Dells is the most fun in the summer and I know that that is really the only season I'd have an outdoor wedding there. Our planner told me that June 19th was open, but now has emailed me saying, "the tent is available on September 19." I don't want to get married in WI in the fall and am hoping it was just a typo. I told her that we would really be happy with any Saturday in the summer, so hopefull that works out. We love that resort and their tent, it's perfect.
We've decided on our colors, pink, orange (well, more of a coral ) and yellow accents here and there. We want more of a celebration feel than something super fancy. It's more us and we'll feel more comfortable. I can't decide what color I want the bridesmaids dresses to be, I just know that I don't want them to be orange, or bright pink. My dress has a vintage feel to it, and I can't picture that with something to bright. Maybe I'll have them be more of a pale pink with bright flowers...hhmm...I dont' know yet.
As far as decorations go, we have decided that we will use minimal flowers. The bouquets will be flowers, possibly mixed with paper flowers (depends on how good I get at making them). I will be making (hopefully along with some help) a lot of paper flowers and buying paper lanterns that will hang from the ceiling of the tent above the tables and then there will be paper lanterns with candles in them as the centerpieces. I am also creating vases full of the paper flowers out of tin cans with ribbon and fabric wrapped around them. I am so excited about this!
I'm going dress shopping this weekend with my future sister-in-law and I'm really excited about that, should be fun. And who knows, maybe I'll find a dress that I like more than the one I've already found. In that case, I wouldn't pay for it at all until my parents get here in August so that they can see it and help me decide.
Yesterday, Matt and I talked a lot about our honeymoon, and I have given up to the fact that our room realistically won't have beautiful white curtains that have a breeze blowing in from the ocean...(although, if we could find something like that, that is affordable, I'd be all over it!). We looked into Sandals in the Bahamas and both of us were really pleased with what their resort had to offer. 7 nights all-inclusive with an ocean view room for only $3,500, thats about $1500 cheaper than the other places we've looked at. There were also plane tickets right now from WI to Nassau for only $174 a person. So, we'll see about that.
Right now we just have to save, save and save some more to be able to get our date. We have to pay $1,000 as a down payment before the date is ours (hopefully we get a summer date) I'm a little worried about that.
I'm realizing that wedding planning is a lot more work that I thought it would be. Especially because a lot of these things have already been ideas in my head since I was a little girl (colors for example). There are going to be a lot of people at our wedding. 300 is the limit for the reception and I'm thinking we're going to be pretty close to that. I think 150 is a good number, but our invitation list is waaayyy bigger than that. This is so much fun and I know that this time is going to just fly by. We have to be super careful with our money and make sure we are always concious of our budget. I made one last night that goes week by week until June 19, 2010 and if it goes according to that plan, I'll be able to alone save $7,500 plus have an extra $100 per week for extra stuff. So then add in Matt's savings for the wedding and our parents help, I know we're going to be just fine! We can make this wedding between 10,000 and 12,000 easy...

I have never been more excited about something...I can't wait for us to be married!

Here are the links for my centerpiece ideas, as well as our resort site. Oh yeah, and I'm also making the napkin rings from the picture : )

chulavistaresort.com

http://www.marthastewartweddings.com/article/pom-poms-and-luminarias?autonomy_kw=pom%20poms&rsc=header_6

Cricut Expressions

I'm a sucker for infomercials and this morning Matt and I saw one for Cricut Expressions. I want to buy this so bad, it's amazing! I love scrapbooking and doing projects, and it does it all. I've been working on a Disney scrapbook with Matt since last December and now that I've seen this, I have a new motivation to start working on it again, and actually to finish it. If I had a die cut machine, I'd be able to make the most amazing scrapbooking pages and cards. I could even make cuts out of fabric to make some amazing purses, bags or dresses. I also want a sewing machine. This is pretty silly I know that I'm on a kick about something I saw on an infomercial, but I love being crafty and haven't seen something like this before....awesome!

http://www.cricut.com/shopping/ProductDetails.aspx?id=123

let the good times roll...

I have waited for this time in my life to come forever, probably while I was still in the womb. I can't believe that I am marrying the man of my dreams and that everyone I love will be there to share that with me. I could not ask for a better fiance, better in-laws, or a better family...they're all amazing. I feel so lucky and excited! I have recently moved to the Seattle area and am from a small town in Wisconsin. I met Matt while working at Disney World less than a year ago and we have now lived in our amazing studio apartment (pictures to come) for 3 months now. I decided that instead of journaling, I'm going to blog because I feel I'll be able to get a lot more out that way with everything that is going on in my life right now. It's such an exciting time, a time that I don't ever want to forget.

Matt and I were engaged on May 17, 2009 and are now planning for our June 19, 2010 wedding! We're getting married at Chula Vista Resort in Wisconsin Dells, WI. We haven't figured out where our ceremony will be, but we know that is where our reception is going to be in a beautiful white tent on their golf course. I have so many visions of what I want the day to look like. I've found my dress (well, that could still change) and we decided on our save the dates tonight. I'll put pictures up of that as soon as they are done...they're going to be so cute! We have our wedding party...but have failed to ask them properly and will be doing so asap. With only a little over 11 months until our wedding, we still have an awful lot of stuff to do...along with working and trying to make friends and be social here. I've joined a bunch of clubs and will soon be starting to do things with them (I'm very excited about this). Hopefully Matt's hours will switch to 8-5 soon so that we can join some sports leagues at Green Lake together. I can't get used to this excitement and in a way wish it wouldn't end.